E[miRRORS] In Her Thoughts

Short story about a beautiful stranger:

She is not who she used to be. Is it because she is tired of letting in. Change is good they say, but that is not the case for her. She is the opposite of what change is supposed to be. Change should make one happy not angry and emotional roller coaster. She is not known for who she is, but she is known for who people want her to be. And people still question about why she wants to change. She is lost in her own shadow.

Drowning in her own thoughts.

She is fighting off the idea of her failing. She seems happy every waken day. Deep down she is suffering.

She is suffering from wanting to not want. She is suffering from proving herself to those that could careless about her.

She gets lost in her thoughts talking her way out of the things that she actually deserve. When an opportunity knocks on the door she will do whatever it takes to not bring it into her life.

Smiles were made to share, but she only smiles to get by…

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Plastic Hearts Don’t Bleed..

cropped-cropped-image.pngThey are people that walked into her life. And they left her broken. Making her believe that her life will never get better without them in it.

Little did she know that all she needed was herself to do better in life. And little do they know that when she forgives, she never forgets.

She is starting to believe that she’s okay when all she is now is broken. 

There is no such thing as perfection.

She hurts herself as she collects the pieces of her heart.

She seems like she’s full of life.

She said: “People will see exactly what you want them to see in you, but in the end the only person worth knowing you is yourself.”

 

[Why]ORRIES..

Life is exactly what you make out of.

Do not dislike things too much, or even love it too much. Protect your heart from such strong feelings..

Learning and self-taught is the best thing that ever happened to humans. And there’s a beauty in that. Such as, being able to accept things as it is or having to change it for the better.

Be your own THINKER. I feel like we live in a society where having to think outside the box means one must agree with the next person. If by struggling with self-confidence. Find a way to change that; practice makes it perfect. Be true to yourself though.

Let things be for the way it is. Spend your time with people who are worthy of appreciating you. Again as humans we make mistakes. Such as, trusting too much, getting betrayed, and being belittled. Never do too much or too less. Stay balanced.

Remember “after a storm there is a rainbow.”

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StrANGER: YOU..

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I wish to hold your hand one more time. I wish to brush your hair one more time. Or maybe wash your face. I know you wouldn’t let me wash your face because I remember how you loved to do wudu two hours before fajr prayer. Or how you’d ask me every other hour if it’s time to pray yet.

One can only wish. 

I wish to remind you my name before eating breakfast. I miss how you’d refuse to eat before mother.

I miss how you used to ask about my morning. And just by looking at my face, you’d know if anything is up with me.

I’m sorry that I didn’t spend a lot of time with you. I was too busy thinking that we’d have all the time of the world and you’d get better. I thought we’d make up for all the years.

I’m mad at myself that I don’t have stories about you. The only thing I can clean and maybe wash now is your shoes.

As I look at the scuff marks on your shoes. I wonder how the world treated you. If it was good to you.

May God have mercy on you.

Feels..

Self-criticism is one of her best characteristics.

At times she shows her weakness, though she try hard to be bubble and full of life. She is struggling. Those that are close to her know that she changed. They can see it in her eyes that she hit so low that she believes there is no way for her to come up again.

We all have our own way of dealing with struggles. Especially when the storm of hardship hit us, we want those close to us to be our backbone. By at least reminding us that we are not alone in such position.

If need to cry out loud, do it! 

However, there is nothing GREATER than the help of God. By praying to him, even when you feel like you are broken. Never underestimate the power of prayer.

In addition, this is something for each and one of us to think about. Do we praise God when life is looking up for us? We are not aware that we are being tested with life,  when there is no hardship. We are being tested with the less fortunate. How we treat them. And if we help them.

To end with, remember we want to surround ourself with people, but we do not need them for us to find ourself. I’m not saying it is humanly possible to never surround ourselves with others, but can we let our characters be defined by the people we surround ourselves with? No. It need to be balanced or we will break.

This life is about making the best out of it.

Ideal P[ART]ner..

We are so focused on who we want to be with than who we want to become as a person.

We are so lost with the idea of being loved and falling in love. Being married and having to be with someone who makes us happy.

To start with, do we ever stop for a minute and wonder if we are who we want to be with? That perfect someone.

When we are asked about our ideal partner, we become the shallowest of them all.

Why seek perfection when you’re made to be imperfect?

We are so lost with the numbers from 0-10.

Remember when looking for an ideal partner, it’s not about making the perfect type of ART. It’s beyond that.

Learn to live your life alone without rushing to creating one with another being.