Plastic Hearts Don’t Bleed..

cropped-cropped-image.pngThey are people that walked into her life. And they left her broken. Making her believe that her life will never get better without them in it.

Little did she know that all she needed was herself to do better in life. And little do they know that when she forgives, she never forgets.

She is starting to believe that she’s okay when all she is now is broken. 

There is no such thing as perfection.

She hurts herself as she collects the pieces of her heart.

She seems like she’s full of life.

She said: “People will see exactly what you want them to see in you, but in the end the only person worth knowing you is yourself.”

 

[Why]ORRIES..

Life is exactly what you make out of.

Do not dislike things too much, or even love it too much. Protect your heart from such strong feelings..

Learning and self-taught is the best thing that ever happened to humans. And there’s a beauty in that. Such as, being able to accept things as it is or having to change it for the better.

Be your own THINKER. I feel like we live in a society where having to think outside the box means one must agree with the next person. If by struggling with self-confidence. Find a way to change that; practice makes it perfect. Be true to yourself though.

Let things be for the way it is. Spend your time with people who are worthy of appreciating you. Again as humans we make mistakes. Such as, trusting too much, getting betrayed, and being belittled. Never do too much or too less. Stay balanced.

Remember “after a storm there is a rainbow.”

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StrANGER..

She feel like she is drowning.

She is angry, and at same time she is afraid. Times have changed.
Every morning, she wake up, and make up her face just to go through the day and just to feel like old days. She is indeed grateful for those around her, but she is feeling somewhat empty. Wondering if it will get better.

They tell her that she needs to be strong.

Easier said than done. 

They tell her it will get better, but its been so hard that she can’t even lift herself up.

One of the things that she is loved for is making those around her feel better about themselves. By showing them kindness.

Time heals all wounds 

Thoughts..

Growing up I cared so much about what people think of me. I was afraid of failure. I think I have failed too many times in life.

I don’t think I would say this four or five years back, but I am so thankful for being betrayed, heart broken and belittled.

God blessed me with people that pick me up when I feel low. Friends who are family and family who are my other half.

I’m truly blessed to say that I have walked into some flames in life. While I felt like I was getting burned for trying to do better, and be better.

As humans we do not know what is good for us. We are just too busy looking at the little things that hurt us. For example, when we eat healthy, we don’t eat such colorful foods with lots of sweets, carbs and salt.

We eat the foods with no taste, some dry, and some with strange smells. Do we care about how the food look? No, we don’t as long as we know that it is good for our body and how it will make us feel. We take it in.

When you put your trust in God and you are grateful for what you have. You will find true happiness. Do not let your success/ failure be the surface of you being happy and mentally healthy. 

Lesson from Surah Yusuf

No one can understand your pain and no one can also take it away, but your Creator.

You can cry to a friend for hours, but wallah the only thing they can say  to you in the end is they are sorry.

When a person is suffering, but they seem to take it just fine, we wonder about what they do.

  • There is a big difference between complaining to your Creator and complaining about your Creator.

For example, when we question and complain about Allah with our problems, that will do no good, but harm our hearts. However, when we complain to Him and prostrate and show him that we are grateful and asking Him to make it easy for  us will heal our hearts.

Growing up, I used to listen to my aunt  recite Surah Yusuf for me and it’s transition. As a child it taught me to always be generous and be nice to people even when you know they are wrong. As an adult it taught me something that will forever be with me.

Few years back, I remember I used to do this “don’t keep everything to yourself. That it is okay to let it all out.” Now I know  that as long as I complain to my Creator that is all I ever needed.

For instance, in Surah Yusuf, when Yacub (Jacob) A.S said, “I only complain to Allah.”

The ayah below is my way of coping now. With everything that’s going on with me, it means that Allah can only take care of me.

(Surah Yusuf) Ayah: 86 [Quran 12:86]
——————
قَالَ إِنَّمَا أَشْكُو بَثِّي وَحُزْنِي إِلَى اللَّهِ وَأَعْلَمُ مِنَ اللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ

He said, “I only complain of my suffering and my grief to Allah, and I know from Allah that which you do not know.

——————–

When your legs are weak and your heart is broken make sure it takes you to prayer that will cure your heart.

 

 

Regretting..

Speak up if must. Cry, be angry, but do not make a life out of that. Do not be that person who need to make excuses in life to just get by.

Be a survivor, not a victim.

Just the other day I received the most heart breaking story. Things are not getting any easier on my end. My father is not getting any better; Allah knows best. I cried for hours, but I thought to myself “life is not always going to stay the same.” The young will become old. The fast will slow down in the end. It is not that I’m in denial, but I regret for not making enough time for him.

As soon as my father got sick, I was forced to grow up and take responsibilities. With The Mercy of God, I had the ability to not make excuses for myself and get up each and everyday and be there for my parents. Also I was granted with another day to make change in the world that I live in.

People ask me why I smile like a crazy person. If my father and the hundred other people in hospital beds can put a beautiful smile on their face and not complain one bit then I’d be ungrateful human being if I cannot manage to smile.

12/22/2016: 1:00pm

I told my father that he is beautiful just to see how he reacts, he smiled and said “you’re more beautiful than I.”

And sometimes I regret that I woke up too late.

My point is regretting is part of making a change.